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Literature Favorites by Kurosaki224


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Submitted on
February 29, 2012
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'What's your name?'

'Why does it matter?'

'I want to know.'

'My name is of no importance.'

'How come?'

'My name isn't a part of me. It isn't what defines me. My name is nothing more than a label.'

'That's a very interesting way of seeing it.'

'Call me whatever you wish, it means nothing to me.'

'Your name is a part of you though.'

'How?'

'Your name is as much you as the color of your hair or how tall you are.'

'Just something else for society to label me.'

'Not so. Something is only a label is you wish it to be.'
100 Theme Challenge #2:Names

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:iconwillis-crisp:
Official #FightToWrite Critique

This is a unique poem/dialogue which reflects a point of view in an original way, you have gone against the norm and this has reflected in your work. I'm very impressed by the story progression and element of mystery around the characters.

However, to improve, I think you should add some description e.g. the character's thoughts, the setting, how the conversation between the two characters come to be or even, explaining that the two characters are just one person conflicting with views in their head. Think imaginatively and turn this piece in to something magical :squee:

Very well done, featured at #FightToWrite

*willthebean
:iconfighttowrite:
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:iconfishingforkitty:
FishingforKitty Featured By Owner May 28, 2014  Hobbyist General Artist
Im starting to think this is more true because my name is Caitlyn not Kaitlyn,Caitlin,Katelin,Catelyn, or Kaitelyn nor is it Katy,Cat,Kitty,or Kate My name is Caitlyn C A I T L Y N its the original celtic spelling but no one seems to care Whenever some one says "Hey Caitlin" its never me they want to talk to i started tuning out my own name so i wanted a nick name but without completely changing my name It just doesn't feel right I love the name Kyrie but no one would most likely call me that let alone talk to me but i suppose the same goes for a nick name they wouldn't use it any way whats the point the other problem is the other Caitlin doesn't have a nick name either so I dont know what to get people to call me so that i know there talking to me because ive made people mad because i didnt respond because i had tuned it out so im down to one person that speaks my name on a regular basis sorry for rambeling its a great piece though
Reply
:iconjohn-doenkris-dario:
JOHN-DOEnKRIS-DARIO Featured By Owner Dec 20, 2012
Quite a potent and powerful piece, well done
Reply
:iconoilux:
Oilux Featured By Owner Dec 21, 2012  Student Writer
Thank you so much
Reply
:iconjohn-doenkris-dario:
JOHN-DOEnKRIS-DARIO Featured By Owner Dec 22, 2012
Anytime
Reply
:iconsan-t:
San-T Featured By Owner Dec 19, 2012  Professional Traditional Artist
Very interesting, I always felt that names are not important..
Reply
:iconoilux:
Oilux Featured By Owner Dec 20, 2012  Student Writer
I do as well. And thank you
Reply
:iconcr4sygrl:
cr4sygrl Featured By Owner Aug 14, 2012
What is your name?
Just call me the doctor
Reply
:iconoilux:
Oilux Featured By Owner Aug 15, 2012  Student Writer
This is the best comment I have ever received. You have won my love.
Reply
:iconcr4sygrl:
cr4sygrl Featured By Owner Aug 19, 2012
I guess you are a fan of Doctor Who. I thought no one would no what I was talking about
Reply
:iconoilux:
Oilux Featured By Owner Aug 19, 2012  Student Writer
I love Doctor Who. It's my guilty pleasure show (even though it rips my heart out)
Reply
:iconcr4sygrl:
cr4sygrl Featured By Owner Aug 20, 2012
I am totally addicted to it
Reply
:iconoilux:
Oilux Featured By Owner Aug 20, 2012  Student Writer
Same here I just can't stop watching it.
Reply
:iconcr4sygrl:
cr4sygrl Featured By Owner Aug 21, 2012
Have you gone back and watched the old doctor who movies? They are so funny
Reply
:iconoilux:
Oilux Featured By Owner Aug 23, 2012  Student Writer
I haven't seen them yet, but I really want to. My bff said the exact same thing about the old movies.
Reply
:iconcynthiacxli:
cynthiacxli Featured By Owner Mar 1, 2012  Hobbyist Photographer
a simple idea...yet when you choose the right words, it becomes something extraordinary
great job!
Reply
:iconoilux:
Oilux Featured By Owner Mar 6, 2012  Student Writer
Thank you!
Reply
:iconchazzyluvergurl:
chazzyluvergurl Featured By Owner Mar 1, 2012  Professional Writer
I love how you show characterization through the dialogue and the content of the dialogue. I can hear two very distinct voices in my head, not because of the difference of opinion but in the way it's worded, how each character speaks differently and with a different tone. I love how one is very matter-of-fact about things but the other is more inquisitive, insightful even. Also, I love how the concept was turned around on the second character, telling them that people will only control you if you let them. That's really neat, and I love how this morphed. I wasn't expecting that but it flowed well and was very natural.

The only place that it sort of stuck out to me as odd was the last line, the "not so." For me, it sounded a bit too formal for that character; I think something a little simpler or even colloquial would've done. But maybe that's just me. It's just an opinion, and I'm sure you chose your words very carefully. :)

Anyway, it's a really awesome piece with a good message. Dialogue is hard to write properly, too; for many it serves as a stumbling block, so it was really daring to create a piece only out of dialogue (but you did it well). Great work!
Reply
:iconquillscribbles:
QuillScribbles Featured By Owner Mar 1, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
Love the poem, and your wicked awesome icon! :D
Reply
:iconoilux:
Oilux Featured By Owner Mar 6, 2012  Student Writer
Thank you!
Reply
:iconquillscribbles:
QuillScribbles Featured By Owner Mar 7, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
No problem! ^^
Reply
:icontallkidgotswag:
tallkidgotswag Featured By Owner Mar 1, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
Plain and simple..... fuckin beautiful :iconcryforeverplz:
Reply
:iconoilux:
Oilux Featured By Owner Mar 6, 2012  Student Writer
Thank you!
Reply
:icontheassholeprophet:
TheAssholeProphet Featured By Owner Mar 1, 2012   General Artist
that is exactly How I feel about my name. that's why I forgot it about 20 times.
also people barely ever call my name.
because with how many other ways there are to address people there simply isn't a need, so why have a name at all.
Reply
:iconoilux:
Oilux Featured By Owner Mar 6, 2012  Student Writer
I know how you feel.
Reply
:icontheassholeprophet:
TheAssholeProphet Featured By Owner Mar 7, 2012   General Artist
:)
Reply
:iconyuriko-chan24:
Yuriko-chan24 Featured By Owner Feb 29, 2012  Student Traditional Artist
this is cool, it reminds me of something i read in Kamikaze Kaito Jeanne, "when parents give their child a name it's the first sign of their love. if a child has even just a name it means he or she is loved." :)
Reply
:iconoilux:
Oilux Featured By Owner Mar 6, 2012  Student Writer
Wow that's really pretty.
Reply
:iconyuriko-chan24:
Yuriko-chan24 Featured By Owner Mar 6, 2012  Student Traditional Artist
isn't it? it's one of my favorite lines in that manga...it's stuck with me ever since i read it in 6th grade...
Reply
:iconoilux:
Oilux Featured By Owner Mar 6, 2012  Student Writer
Ya that's breautiful.
Reply
:iconsimplyprussiaous:
SimplyPrussiaous Featured By Owner Feb 29, 2012
Often when you name something, you own a piece of it.
That's why people like to give nicknames, the same as cats rub their scent on they're loved ones - claiming them as their own.

Labels share information, and build connections.
There are few things in life, the human race loves more than to name things, just look at us! There's not a thing we have come into contact with that we don't have at least one, if not many, names for.

Names are beautiful things. :heart:
Reply
:iconoilux:
Oilux Featured By Owner Mar 6, 2012  Student Writer
Names really are a truly wonderful thing. It's the very first thing that makes everyone different and unique.
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